Sunday, March 28, 2010

Life Soundtrack - What A Good Boy

Barenaked Ladies - What A Good Boy

Freshman year of college, finally, I was discovering some new music. Went on a trip to New Mexico with some classmates. Met a boy from Louisiana who played the guitar, among other instruments. I was smitten. He didn't even notice me.

This was one of those songs that he played on that trip... when I came back to the dorm, I immediately went out to the record store and bought the CD. And maybe because of the boy, maybe not, I just heard it so much more clearly. Could hear every instrument, the guitar, the fiddle, the piano, all the instruments he played, and their parts making up the whole. My memories of those days are brightly colored with the tones of these different instruments all mixing together to make this beautiful, if cynical, song.

But isn't that how we respond to life - sometimes in awe of beauty, sometimes with a cynical eye?

It was easy to forget about the boy. But I still listen to each chorus a little more attentively, for those quiet parts that can go missed if you're not careful, the melodies in the background that add to the earnestness of the song, the notes that make it believable.

Tuesday, March 16, 2010

The wind has changed

Just wrote this tonight. Was thinking about the years when I sat in between decisions, not knowing where to go, what path to follow. I wish I'd had this song then.

The wind has changed
Is it a shift of consciousness
Is it a tender sweet caress
That blows on and leaves me here
The wind has changed
Will it take me away
Or will I remain the same
Or will I get swept away
The wind has changed

And if I don't go
Am I letting life pass me by?
Or do I hear its sweetest sweet reply
"Stand strong and fight"
But if I heed its call
I don't know where it leads
Could my best days be all behind me?
Which way is right?

The wind has changed
And so have I
I call to it
Don't get no reply
It's up to me
To decide who I will be

Saturday, March 6, 2010

Life Soundtrack: She Will Be Loved

Maroon 5 - She Will Be Loved

2007. I felt so focused and so sure about everything. I thought I could control the whole world if only I was in the right frame of mind, but that's another song and another entry. The only thing I wasn't very sure of was myself.

But I found good friends. 3am friends, do nothing and feel at home friends, singing friends, conversation friends, be there when you need them friends. One of them was all of these things.

Some part of me, though, never quite believed that someone like that would want to hang around with someone like me. And so I hesitated, didn't say what I should have, said what I shouldn't have, thought constantly of the future when I would leave and lose these shining times, let myself drift away. And did not come back. Maybe it mattered, maybe not, but years later, I still think that I let something good pass by without realizing it.

When I went to that new city, I had no regrets. When I returned a year and a half later, I was full of them. But my first regret was that I didn't let go of all those things and be the friend that I was so lucky to have.

I will never hear this song without remembering the best of times.

It's not always rainbows and butterflies, it's compromise that moves us along
My heart is full and my door's always open, you come any time you want-